By Ragan Robinson

Morganton — JoJo Dayton never liked Valentine’s Day, anyway. This year, three months after breaking up with her boyfriend, it’s even worse.

“Especially if you’re alone, this one particular day just kind of stabs you in the face with it,” says the 21-year-old student at Western Piedmont Community College.

She’ll spend Feb. 14 working, then hanging out with friends. And trying to ignore all those girls walking around with roses.
Tammy Waters, 36, is married now. But she remembers being single on Valentine’s Day.

“Back then I guess you could say I was a hater,” she says. “I thought everybody was crazy — in love to get hurt.”

Ashley Wells has a man in her life now, too. But she didn’t let Feb. 14 get her down when she didn’t.

She would buy cards for her family and join them for dinner out. It was never depressing, says the 22-year-old.

Eighteen-year-old Jasmine Logan isn’t going to let being single get her down this year.

“I guess I’ll go out and get my hair done, probably get my nails done — treat myself,” she says.

She’s got the right idea, says Ana Weber, the author of “Dumped: The Ultimate Guide To Starting Over.”

A gift to you from you is better than no gift at all. Weber recommends splurging on that new sweater or that new scarf you’ve been eyeing. We all know how looking good translates into feeling good.

“Just because you don’t have a significant other doesn’t mean you can’t celebrate the day of love,” she says.

Do beware of going overboard, Weber warns.

You’re not going to keep feeling great about yourself if you can’t pay the power bill because you blew the budget on a new pair of pumps.
Still, treating yourself is No. 1 on Weber’s list of pointers for being single on Valentine’s Day.

She knows what she’s talking about. Weber’s husband left her just before Christmas 2005. Not long ago, he told her he was getting married again. She was big enough to hug her ex and congratulate him, even as she looks forward to Valentine’s Day as a single divorcee.

Here’s some other advice from the expert:

Socialize, flirt and GET OUT OF YOUR ZIP CODE

Sitting home with a bowl of ice cream isn’t going to do you any good. You’re better off to connect with other peo-ple. The love is out there. It’s not at home with you and the tissues.

On a day like Valentine’s, you’ll be better off around people. It doesn’t matter if you are in love with any of them.
The mood will wear off on you. That’s easier if you’re in a new place around new people.

“Instead of refueling the lack, you’re recharging the have,” Weber says.

Be Passionate about your freedom, space

Try doing something spontaneous — something you could never do if you were tied down.

Pick something your ex hated — try sushi or square dancing.

Most of all just be enthusiastic. Not having a significant other isn’t the end of the world. Don’t let it be. Be aware of how precious a gift life is. Be grateful. Don’t waste it moping around.

Being passionate about life will have unexpected consequences, Weber promises.

“It’s like a magnet,” she says. “The universe will send the passion back to you.”

Give other people the best of you

Not being in a relationship doesn’t give you license to treat other people poorly. Don’t waste your energy hating your ex or despising the skinny woman next door. Counteract a bad Valentine’s Day mood by sharing and giving. Weber will bring candy or a rose to her coworkers. But you can give on the cheap, too. Have lunch with a friend you haven’t spent much time with. Stop by to see the aunt you’re always meaning to visit.

“Build yourself up by being there for others,” Weber says.

When you realize life isn’t all about you, life becomes more rewarding.

Tell-a-Friend
Posted in Gab in Print

The American Heart Association designates February as “Heart Month.”
Here are some things that you can do to improve your heart health:

- FOOD
Have an overall healthy eating pattern which includes a variety of fruits, vegetables, grains, low-fat or non-fat dairy products, fish, legumes (beans), poultry or lean meats.

- WEIGHT
Make sure your weight is appropriate.
Eat fewer calories if you are less active.

- CHOLESTEROL
Know your cholesterol levels. Total cholesterol, HDL (“good“cholesterol), LDL (“bad” cholesterol) and trigylcerides.

- FATS
Limit foods that are high in saturated fat, and cholesterol.
Avoid trans fats (foods that contain partially hydrogenated oils).
- BLOOD PRESSURE

Limit your intake of salt, salty foods and alcohol.

- QUIT SMOKING

- EXERCISE
Get regular exercise, at least 20 minutes each day.

Tips For Making Your Valentine’s Meal A Success
Recently I sat down to tape a radio program with Joe Scully, chef and owner of The Corner Kitchen Restaurant in Biltmore Village.
Together we came up with some key components to make a wonderful Valentine’s meal for your sweetheart.

It is not as much about the recipe as about making what you and loved one enjoy.

Romantic meal NO-NO’s…ribs, fried chicken, spicy shrimp … stay away from the messy and hot and spicy foods that won’t contribute to a romantic mood.

Start out with shrimp cocktail or oysters on the half shell that can be prepared ahead of time and stored in the refrigerator.

You can buy good quality pre-made cocktail sauce at Ingles.

Have tossed salad with a light dressing and consider adding mandarin oranges, toasted nuts or thin slices of apple to make it a bit more interesting.

Select a good quality protein ... filet mignon, jumbo shrimp or prawns, sea scallops, salmon or pork tenderloin.

Remember it is about quality, not quantity.  Rich food in moderation is very satisfying.

The last thing you want is to be stuffed and uncomfortable after your special meal.

Select a simple side dish. Roasted new potatoes, grilled asparagus, risotto, grilled red pepper or even rice pilaf work well for most entrees. Serve some great fresh bread.

Finish your meal with classy fresh fruit such as large strawberries or raspberries along with good quality dark chocolate or a chocolate dessert from the Ingles bakery that you can share.

If you enjoy wine, don’t forget to get a nice bottle to compliment your main dish.

You can finish or start your meal with a glass of champagne

Tell-a-Friend
Posted in Health Gab in Print

Tracy Farnham
www.grabthegab.com

Are there any sprouting kid-size couch potatoes at your house?

Over the past 50 years modern technology and innovations have brought more convenience into our lives, but we still never have time to get moving. It seems our society is more sedentary than ever before.

Toni Reece, facility coordinator and lifestyle weight and management consultant with Phifer Wellness Center says, “It really boils down to the parents because kids follow by example.”

Stating statistics from the American Council on Exercise, Reece says 63 percent of children are no longer physically active by the time they reach high school. Those that are physically active have fewer chronic health problems than kids who are sedentary, she adds.

The excuses
We all have excuses, but fail to embark on physical activity with the exception of moving our body from point A to point B. In order that this doesn’t come out sounding like a ‘do as I say and not as I do’ kind of situation parents should make getting physical a family affair.

Your offspring can sit for hours in front of the television, but if they see you actively involved outdoors, they’re likely to tag along. If not, encourage participation in other ways like offering rewards. When they agree to help you wash the car, sweep the porch, rake leaves or just walk through the neighborhood offer them additional game time later.

Keep the focus not so much on the amount of time they spend playing video games or watching TV, but that we all need to add physical activity in order to be healthy.

A Few Ideas
According to the National Association for Sports and Physical Activity, young people up to age 18 need approximately 60 minutes of exercise five days a week. Exercise can take many forms and doesn’t have to be completed all at one time. Reece says to check with your doctor before beginning any exercise program and always add a stretching program because children have soft tissues and can get injured easily.
“It’s hard to keep kids’ attention spans for that long. So, you have to make it fun,” Reece says.

For winter activities she suggests snow tubing or sledding. Pick physically active games such as musical chairs or kids’ exercise videos that are fun, she adds. “If you have an extra room or basement, fix up an activity room with a ping pong table or climbing wall,” says Reece.

Play a game of hide-and-seek with your toddler or preschooler, or tag with the older children. When the weather is nice, think “Survivor” and set up an obstacle course that even the teens might enjoy.

Encourage team sports or hiking if they’re not interested in the season’s current sport. Other ideas are both indoor and outdoor swimming, throwing a Frisbee, walking, jogging and riding bikes. Also, there’s hunting, skateboarding, golf, even putt- putt as long as it gets them moving.

The Benefit
The typical response to most parental requests is, “Why do I have to?” Keep in mind they have probably sat through several hours of the physical education teacher or counselor informing them of how to live a healthy lifestyle including daily exercise.

Look no further than the human body and how it functions properly to state your cause.

Activity and exercise allow for healthy weight management, promotes better health and sleep if done at the right time of day. Talk with your child’s doctor before encouraging weight loss and be very careful on this subject. Children are very emotional as are adults when it comes to personal matters so it’s best to consult the professionals on this one. Sometimes just the added activity and eating more nutritious food along with their growth pattern can bring about the changes desired.

According to Reece it also gives kids a higher self-image when they exercise. She recommends keeping activity at least three hours away from nap or bedtime to give the adrenaline rush time to settle.

Much of the gaming and video industry meant to get us connected has ended up building walls of separation instead.

Families may eat dinner gathered around the TV, or allow children to eat in their rooms while playing video games. I think we would all agree it’s hard to play tag, hide-and-seek or go on a walk, without talking. While being active as a family it also increases opportunities to talk, laugh and get to know one another better.

Don’t you think it’s worth a try, if it makes you feel better, sleep better and it encourages more family time? The hardest part is sitting up and stepping away from the couch. Just decide on an activity and get started.

Tell-a-Friend
Posted in Gab in Print

By Adam Shull

Well Gab readers, I had it all planned out.

I had the perfect idea for an attempt at a funny column.

I ran in a local 5K race last weekend in downtown Morganton called the Polar Bear Run.

For a twist I wore a coconut bra and hula skirt for your column reading enjoyment.

For those sane enough not to suffer the torture of a 5K, and who don’t know what they are, here are the facts.

They hurt.

5K means 5 kilometers, which means about 3.1 miles.

Usually runners of all ages, genders and physical talents participate.

And they hurt.

My nipples suffered a ferocious chaffing due to the coconuts — especially the left one.

From hearing ‘Go, coconut boy’ from on-lookers to a run-in with a professional clown, I encountered some funny/humiliating moments.

But at the race I also happened to meet one of the most amazing athletes I’ve ever come across.

His story floored me, and I think it can do the same for you.

Meet Coty Bristol
I met Coty at the end of the 1 Mile Fun Run just after finishing my Hawaiian-style run.

Christi, his mom and local coordinator of Burke County Special Olympics, pushed him in his wheelchair.

For the last tenth of a mile, he used a rolling brace, and the arms of Christi and friend Steve Graham.

The high sun cast his shadow over the finish line before his feet got there, but he made it with head held high.

It looked as though invisible strings pulled down on him.

Christi later told me Coty has never walked unassisted in his life.

He is diagnosed with a cerebral palsy-like neurological disorder, his mom explains.

These disorders affect muscle movement, but actually originate in the brain, according to the National Institute of Neurological Disorders and Stroke.

The Institute’s Web site says the disorders are caused by abnormalities in parts of the brain that control muscle movements.

Children are usually born with them and are permanently affected.

Coty is a 12-year-old student at W.A. Young Elementary School.

He’s one in a family of 5, including a brother and a sister.

Coty is a Special Olympian and wheelchair basketball aficionado.

And don’t think an intellectual disability has injured his memory.

He remembers exactly where he finished in the race.

“I finished ahead of my mom,” he says days after the run.

He used a computerized touch screen to communicate.

That was officially the first time I’ve heard competitive trash talk by way of a computerized voice.

Christi says Coty uses the device with icons and pre-programmed sentences to say whatever he wants.

They sat together after a Special Olympics meeting, tolerating my questions.

Doctors actually don’t know what condition Coty has, Christi says with a glance toward her son.

She adds that he shows signs of cerebral palsy such as lack of muscle coordination and body movement.

But kids with cerebral palsy are able to improve their physical capabilities over time with physical therapy.

Coty’s movements haven’t been improving despite three and four trips a week to physical therapists since age 3, Christi says.

So let me get some things straight here.

Did I not fret over my calves being sore after the race? Sure.

Was I worried about my calves working that day? No.

Did I think about what the race and sports themselves mean to Special Olympians?

No.

Christi says Coty and other intellectually disabled athletes gain independence through competitive sports.

“And they are true competitions, not just field days to make them happy,” she says.

They also finally feel equal among their peers and community, she says.

“Coty’s involvement in sports gives him accomplishments. It gives him his own practices to talk about with his brothers and sisters,” she adds.

By the way, the local branch of Special Olympics receives no federal or state money.

All the workers, including Christi, are volunteers with full-time jobs.

For one of the few times in my life, I struggle for words on all of this.

If I had one ounce of the courage and resilience of Coty, you’d watch me in the Winter Olympic games.

If I could be a quarter as selfless as Christi I’d be busy volunteering right now.

With people like Coty and Christi, you just hope to do them justice with words.

To learn more about Special Olympics North Carolina visit http://www.sonc.net

For more information on local Special Olympics events call Christi at 828-439-0632.

Tell-a-Friend
Posted in Gab in Print